I have FOMO with my YOLO!

I like to think that I'm pretty hip on the scene.  I know all the new latest fashions.   I watch all the cool TV shows.  I'm a foodie snob.  Long gone are the days of the McDonald's Royal With Cheese being my go to meal.  My 8 year old daughter eats risotto.  We're cultured up in this Castle.  But as of lately something has been missing in my world.  I didn't know what it was.   All I knew, was that after my walks at the park I would come home and just mope and lay in the dependa staple (yoga pants and husband's unit tee shirt) and eat Boy Scout popcorn and golden Oreos.  A lot of Oreos.  I live an hour and a half from the beach but making that drive just seems like such a commitment I'm not willing to invest in.  I've been trying to go to Target for weeks.  Now you know it's serious, I haven't been to TARGET in WEEKS.   The devil is probably ice skating.

And then I saw it, right there in black and white on the intranet.  Scott Disick is having feelings of FOMO!!!  WTF is FOMO?   I know the obvious question is why are you entertaining Scott Disick?  I have no real good answer for this.  I've found myself deep in the rabbit hole of KUWTK and I can't get out.  So I latched on to Scott.  Don't Judge Me.   I pulled up the urban dictionary and naturally FOMO-the Feeling of Missing Out!  OH I have this all the time.  ALL the time!  Usually it has to do with me not being at Target but here lately I've really had a bad case of the FOMO.  Who knew someone took the time to make it an actual "thing".   I'm sure it was a Kardashian, Gah, do they have to have their hands in everything??  I obviously have FOMO over that too.

Big Chief has went back to a daily routine so I'm here alone most of the day.  And the first day I was really excited about that.  But then I realized that I had no excuse for not mopping my bathroom floor now.  So I went back to the ugly brown chair and moped.   I used to love being at home.  Being Big Chief's trophy wife in my own mind.  Having lunch every day with the girls downtown.   But that's not me anymore.  I had independence in Little Mexico.  And free access to the Nordstrom account and no one said a word to me.  I've got FOMO for Nordstrom.   I've been pursuing work since April.  I live in small town USA here at Fort Rucker.  You can imagine that the major FOMO of Enterprise, Alabama is, well, LIFE, we have FOMO for Life here.  Its a beautiful place, a quaint little town.  But this girl longs for the City life.  I need to be able to wear my Stuart Weitzmans to Mellow Mushroom without judgment and stares.  I need to go to a Mall that's not Walmart.  Sometimes I go to Publix and peruse the deli aisle and sneak pinches off their freshly baked breads and loiter.  I can also BOGO and not get FOMO!!!!

I had applied for a Paralegal job here.  I was so excited when they called me, it was exactly what I had been doing in Little Mexico and the people were so nice.  So nice that I had no idea when they told me they would call me in a week to start that that was the South's way of saying, HAHAHA, we're never calling you again.  And they didn't.   But that's not even the most peculiar thing that happened.  I went in for my first interview.  I was in proper interview attire.   I wore a nice Michael Kors winter weight knee length safari dress with gold buttons and a gold belt, matching inspired Valentino studded pumps.  (doesn't inspired sound so much better than....BCBG knock offs!)  I had my Fendi handbag and I rocked that interview.   They called me back for a second interview.  I knew, I had this!!!  1 hour before my interview began I received a call from the agency booking this job and they said to me: "Whatever you do, don't dress up.  Don't be so professional.  They're very casual.  Just be.  Casual.  Ok?  Can you do that?  Don't dress up!!!"  I immediately experience FOMO!   I have too much of my grandmother in me, how do you not go to church or to a job interview and not dress up OR professional.  Now this was a challenge.  So, I went with the trendy Fall burgundy tee shirt swing dress with the Burberry Scarf, cute sandals and my basic monogram Louis.  Look people that's as dressed down casual as my inner self could deal with.  I walked into the interview again, met the attorney and then he introduced me to his.....Wife.   We talked about my experience, my goals here, my kids and the schools.  It was going great.  And then they never called me again.  I'm not sure who got hired there, but I'm assuming they did not have the September Vogue to guide them.  So much FOMO.

However, along with the FOMO I realized that I needed to embrace YOLO.   You Only Live Once!  I know that one was easy but it saved you a click in the urban dictionary.   I decided to embrace the YOLO.  So I took the plunge.  A new me.  I joined Big Chief's razor of the month club!  Gone is my pretty pink 3 blade razor with the aloe strips that never helped anyone.  I threw caution to the wind and took the plunge.   I have to say I was skeptic, but my eyes have opened and I'm a believer!  Not too mention we save a little money there on the Dave Ramsay budget and that always makes Big Chief's eyes sparkle just a little bit.  Next on the list, I let the tiny human pick what she wanted to wear to school for a week.  This one only lasted for a week because when she came out wearing neon orange track shorts, an American themed spirit shirt and Michael Kors beige flats I just couldn't do it anymore.  You can only YOLO once and there was no way I was going to have FOMO over this YOLO!   My inner sensibilities and my now very famous instagram picture that the very Nina Garcia actually commented on, said I had to shut that down.  So that was a YOLO fail.  But I tried.

I've made a decision that with this year being almost over and new adventures awaiting us in January that I'm going to make a dedicated decision to ditch the FOMO and do more YOLO.   I'm sure by January the cool kids will have come up with something way more clever but until then, I've ordered myself Ice Skates, a bedazzled leotard and a feather hair clip.   I'm going to YOLO the hell out of Upper State New York!